i can't believe

i made it alive this quarter. why is it that every quarter i am nearly..barely...on the inch of dying.
 what made this quarter so hard was because of modeling. all the shows, shoots, with elite, gary allen, and others. i was just bookin it by word of mouth. bad timing, but

i could not have done it without you God. i am so AMAZED. and STRUCK with your comfort, your strength, the hope. i could not have finished my after effects .

barely made it alive this quarter. and the thing is, i made it with NO BULLSHIT. well, just a little bit through photography. but my Coraline? my After Effects? the quality of both work. and my maya face...could have been a little bit better if i did the hair, but ah well =/ i was on After effects the whole time since i had literally NOTHING DONE the night before it was due. i held it off to the end because of all the shows and shoots and opportunities that came out of nowhere. gotta prep myself. meditate. work out. juice the opportunity. so i put the homework aside for a little bit and...yesterday....i came out with a bang.


i am blasting music, taking every moment of this joyful energy and rejoicing with a fucking SMILE!
you have no idea how much weight is lifted off my shoulders.

a 3.5 week break before i start school i nthe summer.
moving next week. just signed the papers & parking.


anyways.
tonight. i believe i am going to Umami with michael :)
and to work i go.


this break. what break? okay at least i have a little weight lifted off my shoulders but whew. i got the Avant War to film. the underwater to film. and the showcase video to make.


lets do this break.

Storyboarding...

til 6:33 in the morning.

EIGHT pages of these:



what a night.
filming my vision in ten hours.




must.
sleep.

gnight.

Dress in the making...

i got the vision. now time to make it happen.

creating the outfit for my upcoming fashion video - Avant War, releasing in March.

trash bags & pin needles, seriously? slap on the face. WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THIS FOR PROM! so if you're ever in a budget and need a dress, and have edgy, bold taste, pull one of these:

RAWartist Activate

the aftermath of RAWartist Hollywood's Activate @ The Key Club.
fashion show, music, art, photography, dance, etc...
a place for all raw artists to come together & share their craft.


reppin MoVintage clothing. amazing show. except for the fact that i missed Jeffrey Star. NOOOOOO.



meet roomie Suziee QQ.

meet big ass eyes. AHAHAH.

this hair by Alexandria of Remix Hair. that nest was hair sprayed up the butt. swear, i was high off Aveda. (took me 3 washes of conditioner to untangle that beast)

and that dress, I COULD NOT BREATH. the crotch line was forcing up my hole. that was definitely not for elongated people. maybe my torso is just too long,
but i sure worked it ;)

makeup, ahahahahahhahha. STILL recovering from a STYE! so i brought my own makeup and they worked off that. the Urban Decay palette. Nikki from Remix Hair saved me.

someone stole my clothes, so i had nothing to change into after the show. that's why i'm still stuck in this dress.

can't wait for more RAWartist events!
<3

Start a Trend

Panties.


guys can pull off their boxers bulging out of their pants, but for a girl, it's considered embarrassing and trashy. that's just how society works. some days, i just wake up wanting to wear certain panties & show them off vividly as a fashion accessory because they individually have this special vibe to it. usually a blissful, care-free, & quirky feel. sometimes i let my VS Pink lace pantie pop out of my shorts for a reason. but today, i wanted this bad boy to shine.

so here we are, the Outfit of the Day:

beware, those panties leave a trail of gold glitter everywhere your booty goes.

and here's to a different approach. started by an accidental push of a keyboard button and ended with:



i kinda like this graphic approach. power to the paint bucket & art history brush tools.

Hungover.

when they're drunk off liquor, i'm drunk off art.
they're spitting out vommit, i'm throwing up ideas.
& now i'm recovering from this creative hangover.
Thank God for the holiday because i am EXHAUSTED.

the difference when one lives to create, inspired, & be inspired.


so if you're wondering, last night's party consisted of...
solitude, pitch black darkness, a sound design observatory, Colombiana inspirations, listening to film scores, aggressive orchestral, pro tools tutorials, damaging my eyesight with this lack of light, "Undiscovered Desires" on repeat seventy-six times, a scramble of the storyboard visually streaming in my head, sketched & written blindly on paper. the next next fashion video. from 1:30am to 7:15am. and then i just fell asleep and woke up ...to chicken scratch...wonderful ideas...& this sick feeling.

but at least i got all the juice out!

P.S. how do you cure a creative hangover?
sleep, i'm guessing?


Love,
the Creative Drunkard.


P.S.S. what do you see when you listen to this seventy six times?

Off-ful

i just realized how off my style can be.
it's never constant.
always underlying what is bold and edgy, but not paved into a certain fashion genre.

yesterday i woke up to an imaginary Japanese culture and today...i'm inspired by the mix of New York & LA.




i wonder what tomorrow will be :)